L.A. Times: Secret Button-Bashing Insider Speaks Out!

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Scott Feinberg of the Los Angeles Times has concocted a brilliant idea – he’s hired a prominent Hollywood screenwriter to give an honest, anonymous account of the movies nominated for Academy Awards this year under the pseudonym of “Deep Vote.”
In his latest entry, Deep Vote begins his assessment with this stinging indictment:

When I realized there was a Disk 2 of “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button,” I almost didn’t pop it into my DVD player, but I reflected that it could not possibly be as aimless and haphazard as Disk 1. I was wrong. There is really no story of interest here, just a series of tableaux, interrupted by meaningless scenes between actors, who, through no fault of their own, fail to compel me. My guess is that’s exactly why it runs on at such a length: to proclaim its own importance.

It’s reassuring to the O.A.B.B.C. to see more and more people who create and review cinema for a living opening up about the massive borefest that is Benjamin Button.  While we may use more than our fair share of bad photoshop gags, limericks, and lists in our quest to deny Benjamin any gold statuettes, people like Deep Vote are actually thoughtfully analyzing the film and giving REAL explanations for why it stinks:

F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote the uncharacteristic story on which this concoction is based as a novelty, and had the instinct to keep it short, which is possibly the only length at which its impossible paradox can occupy one’s attention.

My only disappointment with Deep Vote is his seeming hopelessness that a film other than Button will win:

More often, a bad movie, a box-office “spectacle” like “Benjamin Bellybutton,” with plenty of shots that make the viewer aware of the director, will take home the statue.

Deep Vote – hear us clearly.  Your work is just as important and vital to the future of the world as that of the original Deep Throat was in exposing the Watergate scandal.  Don’t clam up.  Keep telling the truth.  It’s not easy – there will be those who say it can’t be done.  There will be threats made upon you and your family.  But think of the greater good.
A world without Buttons.

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1 Comment

Filed under Benjamin Button Is A Horrible Movie

One response to “L.A. Times: Secret Button-Bashing Insider Speaks Out!

  1. natalia

    is that a midget?

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