While we did not achieve our FULL goal of an 0-13 Buttonless Oscar ceremony, we did help to keep this never-ending disgrace from winning a single significant award.  All it got were technical awards: FX, Makeup, and Art Direction.   The O.A.B.B.C. would like to heartily thank each and every one of our supporters during these trying weeks leading up to Oscars and trying months since Button was unleashed upon our culture.  We have stood up and said ‘No more sh*t from you, Hollywood!  No more 3 hour slumber parties!  No more Oscar bait plots!’ And the Academy heard us loud and clear.
So where do we go from here?  Let’s move forward (unlike our nemesis, Mr. Button, who moves only backwards).  I guess we could protest the DVD release…  But then again, maybe we have greater work ahead of us.  Stay tuned.

Oscar leak – is it real or fake?  We’re on the fence.  On one hand, it’s horrible because Button wins a few awards, but one the other hand, it doesn’t win any of the BIG awards. Here’s the leaked document:

• 5:20pm Here come the accountants with the suitcases containing all the winners.  Please let there be no “Button” “Fincher” or “Pitt” envelopes in there.  PLEASE.
• OR was it actually Benjamin Button that showed up in his ‘Brad Pitt’ phase?
• So Brad actually showed up.  The nerve.  Although he didn’t give the red carpet gang too much time.  Probably because he was embarrassed that he’d be asked questions about Benjamin Button.

A Classic New Orleans Supper

Oysters Rockefeller “Deconstructed”

Sazerac

Jumbo Lump Crabcakes with Sweet Corn and Jalapeño

Artichokes Braised in Lemon and Olive Oil

Pouilly-Fumé

White Chocolate Bread Pudding with White Chocolate Sauce

One glaring oversight: they’ve forgotten about Button’s Bayou Bouillabaisse.

If we were looking for a sign that the Academy has their heads screwed on properly and will be indeed delivering a goose-egg to Monsieur Button tonight, this surely ain’t it. Jerry Lewis is getting an honourary Oscar tonight.

Officially, this Oscar is doled out to those whose “humanitarian efforts have brought credit to the industry.” Unofficially, this award, like the honorary Oscar, can sometimes be a consolation prize for fading heavyweights who have never won in the regular race.

They give out Oscars because you’re a ‘fading heavyweight’ who has been a lifetime loser in Awardsville? Not to pessimistic on such a huge night, but we’ve got early stomach jitters that another lifetime loser who ages backwards may not be neglected as much as we’re hoping…

Kim: I was bored within the first five minutes and it was all downhill from there.  Am cheering for a big fat Zero wins at the Oscars tonight.

Mike: I like most children and even love a few. There’s even a soft spot for movie and TV kids. When the Button old-man/baby bit the dirt, all I could say was thank God.
Forget “run Forest run”, the new catchphrase is die Button baby die… This was no movie…This was the collective water-boarding of a theater of the damned.

Andrew: Plot twist after mindless plot twist, this self-consciously bloated pic deserves to be denied an Oscar. 13 denials. Then the next day it should be taken out back and shot for it’s ‘look at me I am an Oscar epic movie’ pretense!

Heather: If Button wins an Oscar I vow to never watch again! I hated the cheap plot devices of that stupid journal, the daughter and the horrid hospital room, drabble drabble drabble.

Deedee: I hope you eat crow when Button wins the Oscar.

dc: BB is nothing more than good makeup and CGI. Pitt can’t act for peanuts, and the story is boring as hell.

Debbie: I hated this movie and regret that I spent any time watching it. Time that I will not get back. It really is the worst films I have seen since The Majestic.

Kuljeet: I don’t like Brad Pitt as an old man – I did not need to see that. He looks like a bald tiny David Letterman in the top picture. I think they should have casted an actor who isn’t a pretty boy – I like Pitt with guns and his top off. I think this movie says alot about life but it doesn’t work with Brad.

Casey: Benjamin Button ages backwards, but he’s still boring as all hell.

Hummingbirdh8tr: The first time I ever wanted to punch a leathery baby was when I saw this movie!

Ran: It’s nominated for HOW many awards ????????? I sure hope it doesn’t win just cos Brad Pitt is in it. He’s hollywoods golden boy but hasn’t done anything worth while in a LONG time.

Cheers to all of you for sharing your disgust with Mister Button and keep the brave words coming…  See you tonight at 5pm PT / 8pm ET!

1. Benjamin Button goes down as the biggest loser of all-time (officially, that is.  unofficially, it has held that title since its release)
2. The creators of this website will become livid as Button DOES win an Oscar and quickly unleash an unspeakable tirade of loathing and disgust towards the Academy members.

Either way, sounds like the O.A.B.B.C. will be an ideal companion for Oscar Sunday.

How do you know the Anti-Button Club is for real?

On arguably the biggest news day of the year, the CBC took a break from President Obama’s first visit to Ottawa, to cover the news that really matters: Benjamin Button is a turd.

O.A.B.B.C. Co-Founder, Jordan Kawchuk took time out of his busy schedule of Button Bashing, to answer some of Jessica Wong’s questions.

Our ultimate goal is to influence the Academy and the voters and the watchers of the Oscars to realize that [The Curious Case of Benjamin Button] is awful. We will feel that we succeed if – like Gangs of New York a few years ago, which was nominated for 11 or 13 [and] won nothing. If [Benjamin Button] wins nothing, we’ve done our job.

Now THAT’S news. Thank you, Mother Corp.

Read the whole interview here.

“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is an insultingly inane movie. It’s an empty-headed cinematic contrivance. Fella is born old and dies young. Lots of soft lighting and mushy moments of sentimentality. By heavens, it drags. I imagine the core is supposed to be when Cate Blanchett’s Daisy and Brad Pitt’s Benjamin Button are of the right age to fall in love. That’s about 10 minutes of substance. The rest is a convoluted movie in love with itself and its tricks. It delivers only one emotional truth: For a while, we are in our prime as human beings, and before and after that, life is disappointing. Big deal.”

John Doyle, congratulations – you are now officially inducted into the O.A.B.B.C. Hall of Fame.  Bless you and your vivid encapsulation of this utter waste of celluloid.